A man walks into a bar wearing large and baggy pants. The bartender asks him, "Why the large, baggy pants?" The man replies, "Because they're comfortable."

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Q. What did the fat man say when he ate a salad? A. Yum.

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What do you call a man with no legs or arms trying to ski? Impossible.

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How do you sneak Jews across the border? In an ashtray.

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emma: mat has a quick reaction time

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OMG, THIS ACTUALLY WORKS!! 1. Hold your breath? for 5 minutes. 2. Die

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shitted on em put your numbah 2s in the air if ya did it on em

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Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

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What is worse than seeing a pile of dead minorities? Dropping a dollar.

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Your mom is so stupid, she stole free samples.

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Nah, could not care less about how I sound on "The network", its just that I spent all night finishing the core concept to my new novel, and all the capital letters and stuff sound like Jim Carrey in my head as I type. So Redcunt, where you going? When you coming back?

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the horse walks into the bar the bartender calls the pet control

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Why was the boy depressed? A. because his whole family was slaughtered on the kitchen floor.

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What's big and juicy and liked to be sucked by women? A penis.

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Your Mommy is a gas pump.

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Why didn't Rosa Parks get her fat black ass up? Because she was an avid partier and had anal with roughly 8 different guys the night before.

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Did you ever notice that if you blow in a dogs face it goes mad, yet when you take him on a car ride he sticks his head straight out the window?

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wats green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree, it would kill u? a pool table

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Whats worse than it raining on your birthday? 911

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nena. nerna. neener. neezie. nena.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attached to a bomb filled with spoons

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Hey i heard you where cool wait that was opposite day ;)

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Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he was greeting his new neighbors that moved in across the street. He was very friendly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops