How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

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Q: What's purple and flies? A: Super Grape

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink without making any grammatical errors.

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Why did suzie fall off the swing? Because She had no arms. Why did suzie fall off again? Becauze Jimmy was trying to snipe her in the head the first time

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How do you get a dog and a baby mixed up? You stir your chili.

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What did the african get for his birthday? an ounce of water, as water is very scares in his community and it is a great resource

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What do you call a banana that just got pealed A banana

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

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hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

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Bacon is delcious.

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sex with dead people. they can't say no;)

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A fish swims into a wall. It does not say anything, seeing as fish do not possess vocal chords and therefore are incapable of speech.

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An epileptic man attends a rave.

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Why did Sarah limp to school? Because she got hit by a tree

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how you throw 'em.

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How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

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Q: How did the Irishman die? A: He was old.

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Q: What's blue and smells like baby. A: A choking baby.

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How do you get 100 midgets into a mini? You have to manufacture a mini big enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It won't be street legal, but at least your problem with fitting the midgets in the mini is solved.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? A one-way ticket to Hell for messing with God's creations, you heathen!

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Chuck Norris counted to infinity; by calculating the sum of a divergent series.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels part.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops