What is three times more dangerous than war? Three Wars.

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What do you call a orange BAD GRAMMER

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A Brunette, a Redhead and a Blond all jump off a cliff, which one will hit the ground last? Since the acceleration of gravity is 9.8 m/s they will all hit the ground simultaneously and with enough force to completly shatter their bodys making body recovery extreemly difficult. They must have had a hard life.

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what starts with an f and ends with a uck? firetruck!!

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Q.What's green and smells like grass??? A. Grass

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How do you make a 4 year old cry? You tell him all his family died in a horrible plane crash.

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Why Did The Horse Cross The Road? He Couldn't Because He Was Still-born

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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Why did the chicken contact Michael Jackson? To get to the other side.

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roses are red, violets are blue, im not going out with someone that belongs in a zoo.

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A blonde goes in an electronic store. She buys a TV and leaves.

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A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for some water. The bartender replies: "Sorry, we don't have any." The man responds: "Sorry, I'm drunk." He walks out.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

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A man comes home to his wife sleeping with their neighbor. This lead to their divorce four months later.

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What would you do if the house you're sitting in now exploded? Nothing really, you would have died a horrible death.

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What did the sick kid say to Make a Wish foundation? To get better

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A flight attendant walks up to a black man on a plane. She then asks if he would like anything to drink.

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? We are both farmers.

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What's the only part of a vegetable you cant eat? The wheelchair

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Why was Timmy sad? He had 15 large cuban men slapping him for 27 hours straight.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says, "It is quite hot in here." This is a lie. Neither of the muffins spoke because in reality, Muffins are not only inanimate objects, they are not humans, and therefore they do not have the ability to speak in a comprehensible language.

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one day a guy walks into a bar. he buy's a drink then walks hapily home by Mad James

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Q:What's red and crawls up your leg? A: A homesick abortion

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops