What is white and can't climb trees? Powdered sugar.

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Why is a man like a packet of cards? Both are organic.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because Acl tear stepped on a spit.

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what did the cripple, the cancer guy, the blonde, and the blackguy have in common they all have no reason to live

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender can you throw me a beer and the bartender says yes and he throws him the beer and the man says I can't catch I have the smallest hands in the world and the bartender says go across the street there is a guineas book of world record store an check if you h e the smallest hands and he does so the next day he goes back and asks for another beer and the bartender throws him a beer and say I cant catch cause I have the smallest feet in the world and he goes across the street and checks and he does and then the third day he goes back to the bar and asks for a beer and the bartendor throws him another beer and says I can't catch I have the smallest penis in the world so he goes to the guiness book o world record store and then goes bac to the bar and asks..... Who's austin bell?????

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what did the child say to his mother? daddy raped me!

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A man calls his wife, but she doesn't pick up. He comes home and shouts his wife's name, but no one responds. He walks upstairs and sees the bedroom door half-opened. He enters and sees his wife sleeping.

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What do you call a handsome nerd? The name that is on his birth certificate.

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What's long and hard on a black man? Second Grade

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Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he found a crosswalk with a walk symbol near his destination.

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Why'd the littler girl fall of the swing? because a drunk driver ran through the swing, the little girl was killed. he was later charged with manslaughter.

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A blonde walks into a bar a uses the restroom. She needed to pee.

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What starts with E and ends with lephant? Not giraffe

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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What is white and can't walk? A PVC Pipe.

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Why did the little boy lose his fingers? He was left unattended with a chain saw.

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If at first you don't succeed, there's a very substantial probability that you failed.

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An epileptic man attends a rave.

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Why did Little Billy trip? Because I shot his foot off.

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What did the giraffe say to the human? Nothing, but it was trying to alert the human of an oncoming bus.

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Why did the sheep cry? Because it contracted cancer

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A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? Well, he's dead.

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A man walks into a bar. He suffers a fatal concussion and the playground is shut down by local police until proper padding is installed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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