Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Cool story bro. Tell it again.

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Is this the krusty Crab? No you idiot this is a phone!!!!!

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There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

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"I am proud to be black and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist. "I am proud to be white and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Racist and offensive to black people "I am proud to be asian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist "I am proud to be Ethiopian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Said nobody, ever

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A-S-S-H-O-L-E!!!! Everybody A-S-S-H-O-L-E!!!!

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Why did the little girl go to the hospital?........................Beacuse she fell when trying to steal cookies out of the cookie jar on top of the fridge.

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69

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Why did the man have square fingers? Because he has Apert Syndrome

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she is blind.

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Roses are red Violets are actually the color violet, contrary to popular belief.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but the real question is why there are two flies having sex inside a light bulb.

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whats 1 + 1? 2

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My period is red, Your sauce is white, now pull down your pants and let me do my workout.

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Why are rich guys gay? Because they can afford to be

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Whats black,White and Asian? everything we are all equal

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock? Who's there? Not Mary.

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I have this friend named Rachel, so I call her Rachel.

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guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

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I have aids

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because in between 6 and 7 there used to be the number § but 7 raped and murdered it.

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Why did the boy have no ankles? Because his legs were amputated

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Q: What did the train say when it sneezed twice? A: Trains are inanimate objects, thus they cannot sneeze or talk. Are you an idiot?

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Nero, thank you for this opportunity, I desire to join the shadows, I left a thumbs up. Michelle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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