oh hai

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why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

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Why did the black man go to prison? He was visiting his client to give him legal advice.

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What is worse than adolf hitler? Justin beiber

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An Italian leaves the mofia

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Statistics show That people with the most birthdays Live the longest

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phone and phone charger were talking to each other suddenly a massive hand swopped down to the charger and another hand came down and grabbed the phone they both started screeming so the hand stabbed the phone with the phone charger so the phone said... ALL I DID WAS SCREEM (RANDOMZZZ) (L.W)

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DO NOT CONTACT THE ONES THAT LEFT! I REPEAT DO NOT CONTACT THE NEWCOMERS THAT LEFT! Nero7 was not the only one that became suspicious when we suddenly found thousands upon thousands of new potential members more than willing to join us, many of not most of them, before even learning any essential details about our purpose! While many morons and idiots assumed that Neronism was becoming popular, we all fucking know that we have done everything to keep this all hidden! And then suddenly everything from wealthy people to politicians arrive? No way! Nero7 is with us, and while we have thanks to the hidden camera`s he insisted we install about everywhere except under the goddamn toilet bowls, we have concluded that these people all have similar racial traits, and all speak the same language. Nero7 is barely conscious due to fever, but he keeps pointing at the screen and shouting Russian Spetznas! If this is true, (and to us it sounds Russian and they are obviously very coordinated and no simple grunts) Then we are all screwed... I mean from Nero7`s feverish ramblings and and his database, we can only assume that this is some sort of rogue sub department, of a smaller force than we first assumed, but these guys consist first and foremost of specialized soldiers and hackers... We are scrambling for ideas, exit strategies, while doing our best to get Nero7 out of here, he suggests we question the mercenary that assaulted him which is in prison. I fear we might have to break our ethics and code of honor among many things here, but getting that mercenary out and... Somehow getting answers from him, might be our last hope. Listen "Eliza" if any of you got any Intel at your position, let us know, we are well hidden considering these men that have taken over most of what we can at this point say Was the order, at least the one we knew... Listen, if you got any Intel from your position, let us know, and damn it if these bastards begin killing people, any of you for that matter... ...At this rate the order will end up exposed, and remembered as some terrorist mindwashing religious cult... If you have anything, even ideas, share them with us, damn... All these years with efforts, creating a system of our own... Never hurting a damn fly, it seems like it is all going to end with most of our members getting recruited by a handful of specialized Russians or killed...

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what worse then stepping on a lego? watching your son kill your wife

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What kind of cheese isn't yours Nacho Cheese actually it depends on the type of cheese that you stole due to your kleptomania

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what do you do when you see a injured black man screaming in pain rolling on the ground assist him or call 911 depending how severe the injury is

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i hate christians and muslims, until drugs are involved. iduno what dat is, i try it.

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What do Robbers Get for Christmas? Other peoples things.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The KGB Yes, How can I help? We are looking for a local serbian mobster who we believe to be hiding in this Village have you seen this man. No I cant say I have. Sorry Well thank you for your time and if you notice anything please try and let the local Police know.

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What do you call a barn full of black people? antique farm equipment.

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Chrismas? A: Cancer

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What did hitler do with the vegetarians? Nothing, because he was one.

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Whats the difference beetween a pilgrim and a jack-o-lantern? Jack-o-lanters didn't discover america.

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Knock Knock Who's there? ........

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What do an airplane and a strawberry have in common? They can both fly.... Except for the strawberry

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who cares wats behind the green class door people cant be in it

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Q Whats Yellow, Has a body, And has a Spiky head ? A a pineapple

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Your mamma's such a whore, she sleeps with men who pay her.

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Why do the lesbians where pants? Because they are extremely comfourtable and the best for cold days

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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