Guy 1: Hey, do you like fish sticks? Guy2: Yeah. Guy 1: Me too

What did Jesus say as he walked on water and people went like WOHOO! OMG WE ARE TOTALLY GOING TO CHISEL THIS INTO JEWTUBE SO EVERYONE CAN SEE! "BEHOLD AS I WALK UPON THIS WATER WHILE ALL OF YOU HAVE FAILED BEFORE ME! ONLY I CAN WALK OF THIS WATER OF FROZEN WITHOUT SLIPPING! Nero: Because go fuck yourself asshole. Lol... Jewtube was not as widely available as youtube so yeah... Walking on ice without falling over was a big thing back then... You know such as OMG! EATING BREAD AND DRINKING WINE! WOOOOOOAAAAH SCIENCE! AND BURNING BUSHES SPOKE AND... Moral: "Ill be back, you know, just to annoy you, and because I want to, a real man needs no other reason, and that is why you fuckers need so many of them"

sometimes when im bored i dress in white pour water on the ground and roll around in it and pretend im a papertowel

Who are you if you can rub 2 ice cubes to make fire? Chuck Norris

An albino and a jew walk in to a bar. They both order the same drink and chat for a few minutes before the albino must get home to his wife. The jew leaves shortly after, tipping the bar tender a generous amount for his superb service.

What did the homeless man get for christmas eve? Hypothermia. What did the children get for christmas day? A traumatic experience when they tripped over his snow-covered corpse.

Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a fried chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

What do a black man and an elephant have in common? They are both multi-cellular organisms, they both belong to the kingdom Animalia, the phylum Chordata, and the class Mammalia, they both possess vertebrae, they both move through legged locomotion, they both possess knee joints and they both possess the capacity for altruistic behavior.

Sticks and stones may break my bones.

why did the skeleton cross the road ? because it wanted too. lolz

A guy said a racist joke and he got beat up now he is in the hospital for what he said.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs. Why couldn't she see? The sun was in her eyes.

A woman crashes her car into a pole Thier family is suing for a hit and run

A man goes to the doctor and is told, "you have cancer." He then spends his last days writing a bucket list, but losing his leg in a wood chipper before he could complete a single item on his list

Whats the difference between a car and a baby? I would have a hard time throwing a car.

Why did the girl gO shopping?! Because she got paid and wanted to blow(;

Burp

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

A Jew, Catholic, and a Mexican walk into a bar. The Jew leaves first for an unrelated reason.

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

I like to slap biitches, I like to slap hoes

guys stop with the jewish jokes anne frainkly its getting old

What is the difference between a girl and a woman? Age

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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