Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had Leukemia

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's worse than a spilled ice cream cone? 2 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 2 spilled ice cream cones? 3 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 3 spilled ice cream cones? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? 4 spilled ice cream cones.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A man and his wife are sitting on the couch in their house, watching tv. The man says, "Do you smell smoke?" The woman then replies, "No." They then proceed to watch more tv.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

don't make holocaust jokes, my grandfather died in the holocaust, he fell out of the birds nest shooting Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you call it when you kill a Jewish homosexual? Murder.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What is the only day of the year when you're guaranteed to find me? The day I kill you.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Jesus can walko water Humans are 70% water I can walk on humans Therefore i am 70% Jesus

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the bus driver lose his family in a car accident? Bc the little boy was seeking revenge

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo, time to go to Auschwitz.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A jew a muslim and a catholic walk into a doctors office. The doctor is arrested for raping a child and his office closes. The Jew and Muslim find another doctor andthe Catholic dies because he had aids

thumb_up thumb_down +28

You know why the economy is so bad? Years of giving into corporations instead of local business. This moves the profits to the owner of the company instead of mom and pop who will be giving it back to the local community.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the chicken cross the road? I can't really remember the reason, it was about 5 years ago and a lot of things have happened since.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Santa Clause, a smart blonde, and the Queen of England all jump out of a plane, which hits the ground first? Galileo's theory tells us that all objects fall at the same speed regardless of weight, so they all hit simultaneously.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

How did the retarded, blind child win the Special Olympics? He didn't, he died of terminal lung cancer the year before. R.I.P.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Whats slippery and wet? A wet slipper.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's the differences between oranges? Trees don't have doors.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was standing next to you.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

shut up kobe!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Yesterday I was diagnosed with Depression... It made me sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why was 6 afraid of seven? because 7 brutally beat and raped 9

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q: What's purple and flies? A: Super Grape

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the italian go to jail? because he had just robbed a bank and then brutally murdered his wife and kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops