Knock Knock. Who`s there? The police, your family were killed in a bakery A German bakery.

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If you dislike this you are a homosexual (watch how many dislike this)

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Q: why did suzie fall out of the swing? A: because she was a pinecone

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what did the crow say do the dead gazelle? - nothing the crow ate it

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Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is a chicken and is not intelligent enough to know that he is about to be hit by a bus while hopelessly searching for food under an elderly man's nose.

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Q.When is a dog, not a dog? A. never

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Why is Macaroni Boy so Cool Because He's not

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Why did the man cry when he received his meal at McDonalds? They didn't give him a happy meal.

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Why did the student shoot his teacher? Because he was super depressed and was just diagnosed with stage four brain cancer. And he was black.

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What's the difference between Elisabeth Fritzl and Pope John Paul II? Pope John Paul II wasn't imprisoned and raped continuously over a 24 year period in a horrific act of cruelty by his father

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Q: why can't women drive? A: because there is no road between the kitchen and the bedroom

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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Moral

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A man looks in his toilet and gazes in fear of the fact that there is blood on his bowel movement. He has colitis

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fduck

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Seven

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What do you do if a bird shuts on your windscreen? A:never take her out again.

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What do you call a blue and black dot on the wall? A fly wearing blue jeans.

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This is a haiku I said this is a haiku You read a haiku

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What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

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You are driving a canoe home when the wheels suddenly fall off. How many pancakes does it take to fill a doghouse?

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They see me rollin' They hatin' Patrolin they try to catch write a joke Try to catch me write a joke Try to catch me write a joke (tootle loo, I see you ;)

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Why did the plane crash? The pilots had brain damage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops