what do you call Mackenzie Phillips? five head

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heat!

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What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody nose.

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Your d is so small that when you had a boner and walked into the wall....... YOU BROKE YOUR NOSE! Millimeter Monster bro

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Q. When's The Best Time To Wear A Striped Sweater? A. All The Time.

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Hey, did you guys hear what happened the Steve Jobs? He died.

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whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? being wrongly accussed of a crime you didnt commit because of your race, and being put on death row

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Why did the little boy have to go to the hospital? He dropped his ice cream. Why did he drop his ice cream? He got hit by a train.

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What ever happened to the bartender that asked, "Why the long face?" He was punched hard on the face for asking a stupid cliche!

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What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

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What's big and juicy and liked to be sucked by women? A penis.

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What did the orphan get for his birthday? Shit on.

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A young boy recently saved a priests life. He found a solid lump on his testicle.

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There's two sausages in a pan.. One says "Wow it's hot in here" The other says... "agrhhh a talking sausage"

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How many Jews can you fit in an oven? None, it's illegal.

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how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

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knock knock whos there i dont know. go look

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have a gun, So get in the van

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roses are red, violets are blue, your boyfriends thinks i'm hot that's why he dumped you

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? BECAUSE HE WAS DEAD.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Why did the clown chase the boy? The boy was sad and needed cheering up

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What did the cannibal order at McDonalds? Big Mac, extra pickle, hold the mayo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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