Your mammas so fat, she weighs significantly more than the average person.

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What is a baby chick after 9 days old? 10 days old.

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what do you call a black person who hated fried chicken? a vegetarian.

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Q: What's wrong with being gay A: Nothing is wrong with anybody because we're all human

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why is 6 scared of 7 because 7 is scary...

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What did the penguin say to the fisherman? Nothing, they are different animals, and thus, unable to communicate.

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MySpace.

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How do you run faster than a cheetah? Cut off its legs.

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Q; What is green and eats rocks? A; The green rock eater... Q;What happens when you through a rock straight up in the north pole? A; The green rock eater eats it..

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Guy 1: why are you such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most p***y

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Roses are red violets are blue... Only not really. Actually light is reflected off them and these colors show up soo....

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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What happens if you fell off a 600 foot cliff? You die.

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What bird can lift the most? i do not know, I suggest asking an Ornithologist

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Bob and Joe are talking about how their grandfathers died in the Hulacaust. Bob says "Mine died in the gas chambers" Joe says "Mine got drunk and fell off the guard tower.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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Two horses were discussing their racing records. The first said, "In my whole life I had won ten races." The second horse says, "Well, I've won twelve of those!" A greyhound trotting by chimes in, "Not bragging guys, but in my career, I've won twenty!" "Unbelievable!" exclaimed both horses. "It's a talking dog!"

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Why did the baby die, because he got herpes, so did his mother, there both dead now.

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A used condom filled with water and left on a radiator makes an ideal and inexpensive lava lamp.

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If I give you 5 dollars, and you give me 5 dollars, then we both still have 5 dollars, which when combined will equal 10 dollars. Meaning we could buy something that cost's 10 dollars or less. But we should probably also factor in tax, so we should only buys something that costs a little over 9 dollars.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Whats the difference between a lemon and an ant? They're both yellow except for the lemon.

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a blond a her blond boyfriend were walking acrossed a river. she gose over the river but the ramp brecks when she's past. her boyfriend says wait until night and I'll get a flashlight and shine it acrossed get on the light beem and walk acrossed.she says no when I'm haf way acrossed you will turn the light off.

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What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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