A student exclaimed "This test is a piece of cake!" He ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what happens when you piss on a dead monkey nothing you just lose the urge to pee O.o

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the cat say to the towel? Meow.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

yo mumma is so smelly i can distictly smell her more than her perfume

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I kinda said I did not want to know, sooo... Want to meet up tomorrow? Like for realsies? In that case tell me first (then show me tomorrow as proof), your cough... Vagina, I dont care if its shaven or not, but does it have red hair?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I love you! Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Squirrels are rabbid Yes mi this is a haiku!!!! I know ur reading this so grape grape grape

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How did the fireman get the cat out the tree? He sprayed it with a hose, killing it in the process.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the rock say to the other rock? Nothing, they had just met and both were very shy.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is a quicker way to transfer money than electronic banking? Keeping it on one's person and getting mugged for it, or else handing it over in a mutual deal.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did Sally fall of the swing? She had Down-Syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's the difference between an elephant and a duck? Purple.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

why was the woman in the kitchen? she was being held hostage there by Bob Saget

thumb_up thumb_down -18

- Knock Knock - Who is it ? - I'm a Jehovah witness - Sorry, I don't know anyone by the name of "a Jehovah witness". Bye.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Jon "Bones" Jones will be fighting Rashad Evans for the Light Heavyweight title tonight at 10PM Eastern time at UFC145.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Roses are red Violets are blue you smaell funny just like my poo! this came from the BOTTOM of our hearts!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Nicole: Shove it where the sun don't shine! Katlyn: I'm richer than you! Nicole: Shut your frickin' mouth! Katlyn: You'll be bankrupt! (This conversation was recorded while Nicole and Katlyn were playing Monopoly. They both died in a car accident later that day...)

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A one armed blond is in a tree, how to you get her to come down? You wave to her?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the army guy say when he lost his gun. Wheres my gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Can I have... ...a beer." The bartender asks, "What's with the large pause?" To which the bear replies, "I have... ...a speech impediment."

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call a Muslim that walks onto a plane? A passenger

thumb_up thumb_down -18

I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road and not have their motives questioned.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How long does it take to build a wall? it depends on how big he wall is

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why do gingers have red hair? Its genetically encoded in their DNA

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops