What do you call a New Zealander with 1000 lovers? A shepard

What did the policeman say to the black thief? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do may be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to consult an attorney before speaking to the police and to have an attorney present during questioning now or in the future. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you before any questioning, if you wish. If you decide to answer any questions now, without an attorney present, you will still have the right to stop answering at any time until you talk to an attorney. Knowing and understanding your rights as I have explained them to you, are you willing to answer my questions without an attorney present.

Why didn't the little boy hear the ice cream truck? He was deaf.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

What's clear and smells like alcohol? Probably alcohol, genius.

A blonde, red head and brunette decide the jump off a cliff....... They all die

Suicide Johnny and the Go Kill Yourselves

Question: why did the pilot crash the plane? Answer: because the pilot was a loaf of bread

How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

Why did the black man walk into a bar? To order a drink.

The man was so gay he grew breasts and got breast cancer.

What do Australians and New Zealanders have against pods anyway?

A black man, an Asian man, and an American man are in a car. Who is driving? The black man, it's his car.

WWII veteran screamed! "You d@mn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

What's green and apple-y? You're gay.

Why was the man sad? He was molested as a child.

what do you get when you mix a llama with a ostrich? i dont know

Q. Whats green jumps up and down and then red? A.A frog in a mixer

A man walks into a bar, he begins drinking and returns home visably drunk. His family disowns him as he is a recovering alchoholic who was three months sober.

A plane is falling out of the sky, and there is a Priest, a little boy, Obama and a rock star. There are 4 parachutes and everyone jumps out safety.

Mind magic for fuck ups: Did you know you can train your dog to magically arrive by saying YOUR name! Just tell it what your name is a lot and voila! Moral: made me laugh, fuck the rest of you XD

i knew this one arab, who was so arab that there was nothing funny about him

Why didn't Hitler go to heaven? He killed millions of jews and was an atheist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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