How did the lawyer survive the airplane crash? He didn't.

Why did the man not come out of the closet? He wanted to stay in narnia.

A skeleton walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face? the skeleton replies I have aids.

-Can I ask you one question? -Yes. -Thank you.

Knock Knock Who's there? Can you sign for this package? Certainly

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple

What was Steve Jobs' favorite fruit? Grapes.

What did the man say when his wife said hello? Hello.

Why was the blonde staring at the orange juice container? Because she was proud of her work as Chief Marketing Director of Tropicana.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

What's the only thing more horrible than trash can full of dead babies? A live one at the bottom. What's more horrible than that? He has to eat his way out. What's more horrible than that? He goes back for more. What's more horrible than that? This all took place in my garage while I was watching.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven hundred and eighty nine.

What did the dog say to the other dog? Woof.

When life gives you lemons.... Impossible life is not a person nor a dispenser of lemons.

What do you get when you cross a parrot and a beach ball? A beach ball with a parrot design on it.

Why can't girls count to seventy? Trick question. Clinical research has proven that a fair amount of girls are, in fact, capable of counting from one to seventy using ordinal numbers in the Arabic numeral system.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

whats worse than failing your maths test? getting aids

My mom so fat, when she jumps gravity pushed her away from the ground

A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

Knock knock? Who's there? Set up. Set up who? Punch line!

I was strolling along the countryside and saw 2 niiggers peacefully hanging from a tree

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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