How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Will farrow now gimme your hentai"

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Q: What did one Christmas ornament say to the other? A: I didn't know they could talk. Get me that ornament so I can chat with him!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

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What do you get when you cross a man, with Alzheimers disease?

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Why was the blonde in the bathroom for 2 hours. She had to pee really bad.

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What happens when a fat guy falls ? Ohio has another earthquake.

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There is a blonde, Santa and Jesus. Someone throws a million dollars on the ground who picks it up? Me because I shot them

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Uh, well I think of it as quirky and charming, odd weird, maybe unexpected, I could have looked it up but I am dying of lack of sleep here.

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Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

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What did the dog say to his own poop? You gonna eat that?

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Isn't a coincidence that the signing of the Declaration of Independence and the 4th of July are on the same day? Weird

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Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: His name.

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Why couldn't he play piano? Because he is an untalented piece of shit.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, cause they are walls.

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Daisies are yellow Why am I naming flower colours?

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What do you call an Islamic man fling a plane? A very frightened passenger who took over flying the plane when the pilot collapsed due to a heart attack

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Knock, Knock.. Whose there? Its the Census Man!!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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Who did you see last night? Nobody, no one wants to see you.

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You know what's funnier than 24? 25

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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