Why did the car crash? Because the driver was blind

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How many black guys can fit in a minivan? Eight.

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Poop!!

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What did the alchoholic get for his birthday? Nothing. His alchohol abuse split up is family and now he is alone.

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dildos are red, vaginas are blue, mother, what have I done to you?

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Your mother's breath smells so bad that it just doesn't smell very good at all.

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What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by a giant elephant.

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Roses are red..... violets are blue...... I have a gun get in the van

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Why do black people have the whitest teeth? Because they brush regularly.

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What did the pony say when it lost its voice? Nothing. Ponies are incapable of speech.

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An itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout Down came my dick, and forced the spider out

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Why do women love Panera Bread? They think it's healthy.

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bronson watt walks into a bar.

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LUKE, I am your father... this is your mother, your parents dont love you so we've adopted you

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So what makes you that much adaptable? I get the feeling I should get this by now.

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What is black, white, and red all over? something that just so happens to be seen by the color blind.

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wanna here a joke? you.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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what do you call a middle-aged man with one blue suede shoe on, purple hair, pink skin, white eyes, no toenails, 67 fingers, 1 eye, a pocket watch, no clothes, and 8978967564567898765432345678765321234568909876543w245678909876543456098765323456-0987654367890-098765435678-09876543456789098765432345678909876543456789098765435678909876543234567898765323456890-987654345678900987654323456890987653234567890765434568909876543456899876543456789098765434568909876545678987654345678987654567898765434567898765478579458765456789876543223456789876543098765432123456898765432678987654230987653-098765434567898765434898765434567898765456787654567876 butt cheeks? bob.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Why did the guy crash his car? Because he didn't want to crash his truck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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