How do you make a baby stop crying? Make it smell its own diaper then, drown it in its own tears.

what do you call a baby in a blender? A really funny event.

Why did the helicopter crash? Because the driver was fat.

a man walks into a bar and it hurts

Q: Why is eminem such a good rapper? A: well if you want to know its becuase he had a bad childhood experience and and needed some money so he put hard work and dedication into rapping.

What did the woman say when she lost her purse? Where's my purse?

the joke below will not be as funny as this one.... hahaha other joke i just ruined you

roses are red and violets are blue and i was going to write something that rimes but that is not funny here.

Why did the car slow down? Becuase the driver pressed the break

Knock knock. Who's there? Obama. Obama who? Barack Obama, President of the United States. I was wondering if I could borrow a cup of sugar. I'm baking cookies for my family, because they really like my cookies.

What is the difference between a baleen whale and a black guy? One speaks and one says EEEEEEERRRROOOOOWWOWOWOWOOWRR!

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long mane?"

A boy plays in his garden. Then he fall and his knee hurts a lot, but he doesn't cry. Do you know why? Because he's dead.

why did the kid get home from school early cause he was home from school..

Did you hear about the human cannonball who lost his job? Circus attendance is on the decline, as people are spending less money on entertainment, due to a slow economy and poor consumer confidence. Because the circus owners paid him under the table, he did not qualify for unemployment and was force to take a job at Hardies. He has a drinking problem and suffers from depression.

A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

Knock, knock. Who's There? The Fire Department...

Wanna see me count to ten? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I forgot.

How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? The same amount as white people, stop being racist.

What did the black man do when his Polish friend died of cancer? He fertilized his front lawn as it was beginning to burn due to overexposure of the sun.

What's funnier than diarrhoea? Cancer What's funnier than cancer? The holocaust

What's worse than rape? Gang rape.

ur mamas so ugly cause when she looked up at the sky it started to rain

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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