After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed all of six's family

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There are two kinds of people in this world: those that finish their sentences

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Q: Why is the sky green? A: It's not

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme oo

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A man was running from drug dealers When they had him cornered he ran towards the sun and died

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why dont you throw rocks at a mexican on a bike? its unethical and can severely hurt the individual on the bike

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What do you call a bitchy unreliable friend? You don't call that bitch at all.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left his fence open and the chicken happened to cross a road.

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What is green, brown, has four legs and would kill you if it fell on you from out of a tree? A pool table

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And the guy who played Trapper John on MASH wins the coveted 'Last Famous TV Person to Die in 2015' award!!! Woooooooo!!!!

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What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

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How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

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You Mom is so ugly, It makes sense why you always have that look on your face!

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The Labour Party.

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What doesn't kill you makes you injured

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Knock! Knock! Who's There? The Police. Open the damn door. Nobody Is Home.

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yolo your orange looks orange

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What is worst about the great white shark? It's hundreds of sharp teeth, strong tail, or subtle racism? Probably the teeth.

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knock knock whos there? orange orange who? orange you pissed off your wifes taking in the ass from another guy right now?

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What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? Nothing, scientific research has shown over thousands of years that grapes cannot talk.

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Why was the dwarf nicknamed The Anaconda? Because everybody loves a bit of irony.

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Who job is it to protect the forest? Obiously a male and/or female forest ranger of smokey the bear. It's that simple.

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What do you call a needy person? A person whos needs need needs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops