How did the lawyer survive the airplane crash? He didn't.

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How many pieces of toast can you eat in 1 year? well, it depends on how many pieces you eat in one day, does it count snacks, or full meals of just toast, can you eat even when your not hungary, if you throw up does it still count? If it is 1 piece a day, it would be 365.

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why are black people so good at basketball? because they understand the fundamentals, work hard at becoming better, and have fun playing the game/

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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What is the difference between a shark and a human? A shark is a type of fish with a full cartilaginous skeleton and a highly streamlined body and a human is the only living species in the Homo genus.

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Me and my wife set and watch the eleven o'clock news every night. My wife always thinks that she has the different disease that is mentioned each day. One night she was practically in tears telling me that she had the disease that was talked about that night. I looked at her and said "honey, there is no way that you have testicular cancer. You don't even have testiculars." The End

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Why did the little girl fall of the swing? -because she had no arms Why didn't she get back up? -because she had no legs Why diddn't anyone help her? -because she was black.

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What do you call a fat kid? I don't know...you tell me

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A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Girl Scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

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What do you get when you cross a parrot and a beach ball? A beach ball with a parrot design on it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was struck by a car and killed instantly by the impact.

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars...except for the duck

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Your dad is so abusive that he hurts you when he losses his temper

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Say silk 5 times. Silk Silk Silk Silk Silk Now what do cows drink? Water.

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why did the girl go into the kitcen? she was preparing a meal for her well safisticated family which had not ate dinner yet that day.

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she is blind.

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What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing

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What do you call it when you kill a Jewish homosexual? Murder.

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yo mama is so dumb, she got all Fs on her report

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Moo! I'm a goat!

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? Zero, they already stole them all.

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What did the dog say to the other dog? Woof.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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