A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

Person 1: today my doctor said I'm dyslexic Person 2: oh yeah? Are you ahdd too?

What's worse than scraping your knee? Getting a needle shoved into your penis and the needle hitting your scrotum so that you are in serious agony for hours and finding out you cannot have kids because of it.

Whats Worse that 10 babies stapled to 1 tree? 1 Baby stapled to 10 trees

How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb? Probably just one.

Knock Knock Whose there? A field full of mexicans A field full if mexicans who? F**k You

"Why did the chicken cross the road" "why" "to get to the gay guys house" "knock-knock" "who's there?" "The chicken..."

Q: What kind of punch do vampires drink ? A: None... It's really blood, you should know that by now.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

How do you annoy Lady Gaga? Stab her with a knife.

This is an anti joke

How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

im at school

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? No, but considering there has not been a single man to walk on the moon since 1972, it'd be difficult to generate any kind of revenue on this natural satellite.

Liar liar, your dead nans carcass is on fire.

Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

Why didn't the Baby wake up? Because it was dead

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Some anti-jokes are funny, some are not!

-Look! Up in the sky! -It's a bird! -Yep.

What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

i have an apple. now suck my dick

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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