Shit, I can't think of anything to write. That does not mean I'm black

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter. It won't come to you regardless what you call it.

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Why did the Nazi Doctor drown a Jew in the lake? To see how long it would take a Jew to drown with its big nose. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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tomatoe tomato my toe is named tom

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Why did Larry drop his suitcase? Because he had no arms. A) Knock knock, B) Who's there? A) Not Larry

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What did the Pope say to the little boy? Look both ways before crossing the street

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

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What do you get when you cross a cheetah and a zebra? A dead zebra.

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roses are red, violets are blue, ive no money for presents, happy christmas everybody

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? No, but considering there has not been a single man to walk on the moon since 1972, it'd be difficult to generate any kind of revenue on this natural satellite.

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Why can't Helen Keller conduct a Train. Because she is dead.

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I like my coffee how I like my women. Without a penis. - Blake Woodman

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Knock knock Who's there? To To who? No, Sir, it is "to whom"

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Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

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What do you call a seagull that flew into the bay? Wet.

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What do you call a magic MAAAAAAAAAAAN? A magic man

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Hello

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What's rape when you shout surprise? The crime, committed by a man, of forcing another person to have sexual intercourse with him, especially by the threat or use of violence.

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How many eskimos does it take to build an igloo? It depends... probably about six or seven.

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Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

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What do you call a building full of Mexicans? JAIL.

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I used to tell people: step on my foot on purpose and ill FUCKlNG BREAK YOURS! Then I Evolved.. friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Thumb me down or step on my foot if only on mistake, and I will break off both your legs and ram them up your ASS!

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A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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