Why did the kid poo his pants? Because he was Matt Daly

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Fun Fact: If humans stood in a single file line around the equator, most of them would drown.

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So a man is in a car smoking weed when he forgets to crack a window so he over doses and dies. The car crashes and he kills 3 other people.

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What's the difference between oreos and your opinion? I asked for your opinion.

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Joke: two polar bears were in a bath tub. One said "pass the soap." And the other one said "no soap, radio!"

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Knock Knock? Whos there? The police, please open the door.

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what is funnier then this joke? A jewish muslim that is asian, balck, and mexican,and is woomen crossing the border then geting shot and hung by a rope of dead babies

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A man walked into doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

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Friend: What do you call a farting dog? Me: A canine releasing built up pressure as a result of excess carbon-based gases produced by the synthesizing and decompositional digestive reactions in the stomach and intestines. Friend: ... Who is a nerd, pointless, has no social life, and cant take a joke? Me: No one. No one but you is that exceptionally lacking in character.

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Random letters vJKkBvCffsgfsjxmsocowdbwfeascbsa

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I Stumbled this site and then read some antijokes, then I wrote a antijoke but I couldn't write a antijoke because their Terms of Service were down so then I lied to them saying I've read their Terms of Serivce and then I lied again, told them I were human, argued by saying "barnote plate" to them. They accepted.

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Why doesn't Andy wanna bend over to puck something up? That's how he got assraped!

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Bob Saget

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I bont really understand dyslectic peapole

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Roses are red Heres something new Violets are violet not fucking blue

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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A woman was struck and killed by a truck as she crossed the road. Who's fault is it? The woman's, if she hadn't left the kitchen, she would still be making me sandwitches...

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Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A:Because it wa dead!!!!!!

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Q.whats the weirdest thing??????? A.woman leaders

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prison isnt fun it also is bland kidnapping is a crime but get in the van

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How do you kill a blue elephant? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? Spray paint it blue then shoot it with a blue elephant gun

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What did the Asian man say when he got a math problem wrong? Damn it

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A black man comes home from work.

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Q: How do you cure cancer? A: By die aids first

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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