A man walked into doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

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What's the difference between oreos and your opinion? I asked for your opinion.

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Bob Saget

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Random letters vJKkBvCffsgfsjxmsocowdbwfeascbsa

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Friend: What do you call a farting dog? Me: A canine releasing built up pressure as a result of excess carbon-based gases produced by the synthesizing and decompositional digestive reactions in the stomach and intestines. Friend: ... Who is a nerd, pointless, has no social life, and cant take a joke? Me: No one. No one but you is that exceptionally lacking in character.

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I Stumbled this site and then read some antijokes, then I wrote a antijoke but I couldn't write a antijoke because their Terms of Service were down so then I lied to them saying I've read their Terms of Serivce and then I lied again, told them I were human, argued by saying "barnote plate" to them. They accepted.

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Yo mama's so white, she's an albino!

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A woman was struck and killed by a truck as she crossed the road. Who's fault is it? The woman's, if she hadn't left the kitchen, she would still be making me sandwitches...

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Roses are red Heres something new Violets are violet not fucking blue

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I bont really understand dyslectic peapole

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Q.whats the weirdest thing??????? A.woman leaders

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Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A:Because it wa dead!!!!!!

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Q. How do you get a dinosaur off a slide? A. You tell him he hasn't lived for billions of years.

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How do you kill a blue elephant? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? Spray paint it blue then shoot it with a blue elephant gun

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prison isnt fun it also is bland kidnapping is a crime but get in the van

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Why didn't Helen Keller have headphones? Because they weren't invented

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What did the Asian man say when he got a math problem wrong? Damn it

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What stops a fully black english man from marrying a fully chinese women, the language barrier of course!

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Q: How do you cure cancer? A: By die aids first

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A black man comes home from work.

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A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

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Person 1: today my doctor said I'm dyslexic Person 2: oh yeah? Are you ahdd too?

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Why did the cow cross the road? It was escorted by its owner to get to the slaughter-house.

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Whats Worse that 10 babies stapled to 1 tree? 1 Baby stapled to 10 trees

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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