What do bicycles and platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

Roses are red Violets are blue I need a job Stop spitting on me

I don't like Holocaust jokes. Anne Frankly they offend me,

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

I contracted AID's from a prostitute So I went out and killed 4 gay since they are the most prominent carriers of the disease I also killed a black man I kill a black man everyday

how do you get rid of your home work? give it to your dog!

Why did the car stop? The driver had a stroke

What did Little Jimmie say to his mom when he got home frome school? Nothing his moms dead.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Someone threw a fridge at him.

What do you call a black man on a horse? A BLACK MAN A ON A HORSE.

Onions are like loved ones... They are both nouns. And you cry when you cut into them.

why did the monkey cross the road? it escaped from a local zoo a block away

Knock knock. Who's there? Mom. Mom who? SHUT THE F**K UP AND OPEN THE DOOR!!!

Q: why didn't the little black boy have a father? A: because he unfortunately died at the age of 48 with pancreatic cancer.

Why did Billy start crying? Because he was abandoned at a young age- and was bullied since childhood in the orphanage.

Wait what? I did not type that!

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse unable to comprehend english shits on the floor and leaves

What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting brutally raped in the anus by the Dark Lord Satan.

richard is fag

Do you know how to forget? No. Me either, I forgot.

Once upon a time there was a pure and beautiful girl who lived with her step-mother and her two step-sisters. They made her live in the basement and had her do all the chores while they went to parties. Then social workers came and relocated her to a foster family.

This is a haiku Haikus are not really jokes Congratulations!

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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