What's pink and when you press a button it turns red? A baby in a blender. What's pink and when you hit it against the wall sounds metallic? A baby with two forks stuck in its eyes.

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what has four wheels and opens using a key? -a trunk on wheels

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Why did the kid get a bicycle for his birthday? Cause his father is a respectable parent who loves his child.

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What did Mars say to warn Prehistoric Earth before an asteroid hit it? Nothing, sound can't travel through space, it's a vacuum. The dinosaurs will be missed.

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Dakota Fanning

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Pull my finger ouch..

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What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

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What is a bad thing to see and is attached to a boy's body. The middle finger u dumb ass!

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Q: What's blue and smells like baby. A: A choking baby.

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Mugger: Give me all your money. Victim: No. Mugger: Okay. (Moves on to find his next victim)

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what do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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A mermaid walks into a bar, but she has no legs, so she flops over and proceeds to drag herself into the bar.

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A man walks into a bar. He has suffered from a concussion and is now in the emergency room.

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Misner is a twat.

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Like a bit of a cozy fight or something.

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Okay I have knock knock joke but u have to start it. Okay Knock knock Who's there (akward silence)

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What was the cancer patients last wish? For the pain to go away...Yolo...-Avery Scott Vartanian

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i like my babies how i like my potatoes..... skinned

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"Did you fall from heaven?...Cause your face is really messed up."

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My period is red, Your sauce is white, now pull down your pants and let me do my workout.

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The Blonde Gets 100 % On Her Math Test

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When life throws you lemons, your first instinct is to make lemonade. Due to your severe lemon allergy, however, you will die within several minutes and therefore have no viable method of creating said lemonade. You die horribly and your death sparks a movement against the biological warfare of life.

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A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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