Why did the chicken cross the road?... To get to the other side.

A man walks into a bar. He gets wasted and forgets the punchline.

What do you call a mexican with a broom in his hand? a man who likes to keep his office at his own company clean

What's the biggest difference between white and black people? the melanin levels in their skin.

Your mamas so old she died of old age, R.I.P.

Buzi vagy!

what did the homeless man get for christmas.......................nothing

Q: How do you confuse more than 80% of the population? A: Mushrooms.

Why should children always be nice? Because the evil christmas demon KRAMPUS will rip their ears off, put them in a bag and beat them with a stick!

Why couldn't little Sally fall asleep? She was on fire.

A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

What did Helen Keller do at a concert? Sit.

What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

Q: How did the robber steal a laptop from best buy? A: With his hands

A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender was incredibly biased towards religion and had the rabbi removed.

Sometimes I stare at a Frisbee and wonder why it is getting bigger. Then, it hits me.

What's beauitful and disgusting at the same time? Menstration. Jk it's just disgusting.

A man crashed his boat and is lost in the ocean. He comes across a cruise ship, and they ask if he wants help. The man says, "No. God will save me, but thanks anyway." Later on that night, he is eaten by a shark.

What's do a woman's vagina and a camel's toe have in common? Other than being parts of two mammals, they have nothing in common.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

What is blue and not heavy? Light blue!

Why couldn't the colorblind boy play Twister with his friends? He was a quadriplegic.

so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

You know why the economy is so bad? Years of giving into corporations instead of local business. This moves the profits to the owner of the company instead of mom and pop who will be giving it back to the local community.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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