Boy: If you didn't have feet, would you wear socks? Girl: No. Boy: Then why do you wear a bra?

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what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was heading to the funeral house to mourn his dead family.

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a preist sees a rabbi on the street while taking a walk. he says hi and proceeds to have a nice conversation as they are good friends despite their religous differences

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An ant walks into a bar. Nobody Notices...

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My Penis is so big. How big is it? If you lay my penis down beside another similarly lengthy object, approximately 10" long, it would most likely surpass the length of the object you chose to measure it to.

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Who ya gonna call? ... Whoever you need to talk to at the current time.

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Asians

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Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

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Q. how to kill the germ on a food. A. wash it with bleach.

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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A blond walked into a bar. A guy picker her up and then they had sex.

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers!

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why didn't love legs cross the road because he had no balls

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Why was the blonde fired from her job at the M&M's factory? Her Masters Degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the position she had.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your neighbor. Ok, Come in.

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josh Roberts you speccy CUNT

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

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How did Darth Vader make the little black boy's day? "I am your father"*heavy breath, heavy breath*

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John: I just ran over a cat... Just kidding! It was your mum.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT IS.

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A black man walks into a bar He looks at the menu and realizes he's in a bar, so he leaves

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What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. He was upset and didn't really feel like talking.

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops