Why did the plane crash? Because there was no pilot

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what's worse than being chased by a turtle? being chased by an angry turtle

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What do you call a muslim who is not a terrorist ? A muslim

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butt sex

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What's black and crawls around on eight legs? An octopus that just inked itself.

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Yo momma so normal, she got married, had three kids and then lived a dull but contented life.

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Why were people laughing when Muhammad Ali signed autographs for his fans? He was making jokes regarding his Parkinson's syndrome in order to elevate an otherwise melancholy experience for the audience.

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whats red, brown and blown up? a hampster in a microwave

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You know what likes to get fisted? Sock puppets.

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Hey I just met you, and your f$#king crazy,I ate your pizza, so go get me another one!!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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two peanuts walked into a bar they both sat down and immediately left once they found out the bar was serving peanuts.

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What do you call a dead baby who died by getting ran over by a car? Jimmy

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?... CAUSE HE FELT LIKE IT, IDIOT

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What do you call a bus full of white people? A Twinky!!!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is deceased, therefore rendering her incapable of movement, which is required to drive a vehicle.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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how makes licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? depends on how determined you are to find out

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hi im tom. whats your name? joe. hi im tom. whats your name? joe... tom has short term memory loss.

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A dog walks into a bar. The bartender was just about to leave, so he takes the dog home with him. He makes found dog signs and posts them around the neighborhood. The owner sees one of the signs and retrieves his pet from the bartender, thanking him for finding his dog.

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Ed Rambo. EXPERIENCE as John Rambo is kidnapped by AL QUAIDA (because he did not totally save their ass in the second or third movie riiiight) Leaving Ed Rambo, his son (Played by Eddie Murphy) up to the task of saving him, from Al Quaida`s real leader... Yes, its a conspiracy! "Okay, first Obama is supposedly a terrorist, but seriously the secret alliance between Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton?" Bullshit movie reviews. "So the explanation is that Ed Rambo is black because John Rambo married an Asian woman? What about their age? They are probably the same or something!" Mad Magazine. Moral: Yeah because this annoys you, and you all kinda love me I know its Al Qaeda, but who wants to type that... Now it does not say Skynet is watching anymore... After four times... Wow, god damn we need robocop to be real before the Termitetrisnators travel back in time into our dimension. AND NOT ADAM SANDLERS: ROBOCOP.

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Why did the child cross the road? Nobody knows, he forgot to look both ways got hit by a truck and suffered severe head trauma leading memorie loss.

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Why didnt the boy eat his ice cream? Because he is dairy intolerant

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What is black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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