Q: How do you fit two beluga whales into a mini van? A: You don't.

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Guy 1: Hey look under there Guy 2: Under what inanimate object that is physically visible and made up of atoms

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What is similar between a penguin and a newspaper? If you kill a penguin, then grind it up into a fine powder, then the penguin becomes a newspaper.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of 5

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Waiter, waiter, there's a fly in my soup! That's not a fly, it's a gnat.

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So there's this big ass moose, and he walks into this grocery store, & asks the cashier "which isle are the potatoes in?" the lady replies, "down isle 5." so the moose walks down to isle 5 and there weren't any potatoes!

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When is it unlucky to see a black cat? When you are a mouse.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks, as he saw the first two men previously walking into it, and it looks like it rather hurt.

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What did the Wife say to her husband about his Erectile Dysfunction? - Im sorry I dont know how to finish a joke based on this private a matter.

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I just lied when I clicked the 'I have read and agree to the Terms of Service' to post this when in fact, I didn't read it at all.

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There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

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Why did the chicken cross the road... so people could keep asking that question for 4000 years

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Girls get fucked Boys fuck Gays puke

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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Ronan Parke, making Justin Bieber look straight since 2009

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Why can't black guys eat babby back ribs... Beacause They are black too

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John: I just ran over a cat... Just kidding! It was your mum.

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Whats green and turns red at the push of a button A frog in a blender

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Y did the chicken cross the rode to/ get away from KFC

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Gotta go Fast Gotta go Faster Faster Fasterfasterfaster! Moving at the speed of sound I'm the quickest hedgehog around Got ourselves a situation Start getting a new location Without any explanation On top of relaxation! Go- Go- Go- Don't blink Don't think Just Go go go go G-g-g-g-go go! Sonic, he's on the run Sonic, he's number one Sonic, he's coming next so watch out for Sonic X! Gotta go fast, gotta go faster faster faster fasterfasterfaster Go go go go go go go go go! Sooooniiiiic X!!

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Your mama so stupid She has a 3rd grade education

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Hhahahahahhahhahahahahhaahhayournanisdeadhahhahahahahahahah

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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