Thomas Hobbes had a happy life. Actually he didnt, he was born prematurely causing his mother to die. Then his dad left him at an early age to the care of an abusive older brother because he was an alcohollic. He did inspire many political beliefs though

What did the black man get for Kwanza? AIDS

Have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. It's okay, neither has he.

I may have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

What happens when a black guy roles over a speed-bump? I don't know. I have never tried it

What did the boy say when he got hit by a car? Nothing, he punctured his lungs.

Do you like apples? Yes

sean punches bryce in the face, sean then says ow you just punched me in the face. that hurt

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Q: What did jerry sandusky do with little boys alone? A: Teach them how to play football

Why did the man starve to death? He had no food.

Why didn't the blonde eat bacon? She was Jewish, and it was against her religion.

Two octopuses are swimming in the ocean. Suddenly a scuba diver spots one of the octopus. The octopus looks at the human and swims away.

What's worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trash can 1 baby in 10 trash cans

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

John Cena for president

What's worse than the Holocost? Two worms in your apple.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs.

Q. How did the man with no legs get to places? A. He didn't, he died at his house alone

What starts with a 's' and ends in 'ex'? Sex -XH

What did little jonny do when he broke his leg? He proceeded to brake into tears due to the excruciating pain caused by his unfortunate injury.

Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To pick up the carcass of its road-killed younger brother and weep.

Two black guys jump off a bridge..who lands first? They would land at the same time due to earths gravity acting on them both with an equal force.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...