How do you wake up Lady GaGa? Poke her Face.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Youre mom is so dead...

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do Wal-Mart and Michael Jackson have in common? They both have made a lot of money and are also well known around the world.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did Lucy fall out of the tree? Because she sting by a wasp.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why did the monkey buy a shoe? to put em on!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

roses are red orchids are black I like you best when you lye on your back

thumb_up thumb_down -14

kk

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Once upon a time Jimmy was walking home from school. Jimmy was then confronted by a a pedophile so he suddenly ate himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what did sushi A say to sushi B? Nothing, because sushi is composed of aboitic fish, rice and other nutritious components and cannot speak

thumb_up thumb_down -14

josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Chuck Norris has a chin under his beard.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock Knock Who’s there? Boo Boo who? Ah don’t be sad, Boo’s here to cheer you up!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? To honor his father, Jonathan "Red" Hoffner, who was tragically killed in the line of duty. While attempting to save 3 small children in a trailer park fire, the elder firefighter suffered 3rd degree burns over 80 percent of his body. "Red" was rushed to a local hospital and lingered for several agonizing days. He began to rally but a careless error by a night nurse led to his unfortunate demise. His son was psychologically unable to wear anything but red suspenders every day for the rest of his life - not only because of his father's death but also because it was he who had maliciously set the fire in the first place.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did Batman say to Robin after they got on the bus? We should have taken the batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did taxi driver say to the passenger? Where to, sir?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a cat that gets pushed into the pool? Angry as hell.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you distinguish between an unlabeled carton of milk and an unlabeled carton of cream without breaking the seals? You label them.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot for Arabian Air, idiot. What were you thinking?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

There are two lawyers about to enter a court room. They look at each other shake their hands and then the defending lawyer smiles and says "I'm Jewish your f*cked"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a hit and run victim with multiple injuries? An ambulance.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Was that last joke funny? Well this one isn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A large Albanian man jizzing on the pile.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops