Two goldfish are swimming in the ocean. One says to another, "I don't think we will be able to survive in this salty environment".

three jews walk into a bar. then a bear mauls them.

Why do vampires suck blood? Because they re crazy.

What do you call a blue chair A black person

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a trick question. Feminists can't change anything.

How do you distinguish between an unlabeled carton of milk and an unlabeled carton of cream without breaking the seals? You label them.

What do you get if you mix razor blades with babies? An erection.

Yo momma so stupid, she failed the 2nd grade math

roses are red violets are blue i'll be back in an hour or two

Emily Scarpello...Fat Couch

Yo mama so ugly everybody died. The End.

Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7? A: Cus 7 had AIDS and it was bleeding all over the place!

How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

Why was Jimmy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

Q: Billy has 47 pieces of cake, he eats 38. What does he have left? A: Diabetes

What do you call it when you take cheese that isn't yours? Stolen bitch, your under-arrest!

This is a joke...that your supposed to laugh at.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

A police officer walks into a doughnut shop. He approaches the cashier and hands him 20$. He says "Here, I saw you drop this on your way in" he promptly leaves the store.

An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

what is the difference between a black person and a white person there skin

Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? 0. There are no lights at Auschwitz.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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