What's 6 inches long, 2 inches wide, and drives women crazy. A 6 inch long 2 inch diameter syringe filled with heroin being injected into a woman.

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Mama Bear and Papa Bear were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Bear a choice of which parent to live with. "Do you want to live with your mother?" the judge asks. "No! She beats me." answers the baby bear. "OK, then you can live with your father." says the judge. "No! He beats me too!" cries baby bear. So Baby Bear was placed in a foster home.

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Bob: Hey Jim, what's up? Jim: Obviously the sky, oh and i see a few planes too. by the way why are you asking me why don't you just look up?

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Why did the black guy love his new shirt? Because it was 100% cotton

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How do you get your clock to stop ticking? Hit it with a sledge hammer.

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Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

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What worse than stubbing your toe? Getting raped by a panda.

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How do people from Indian Hill laugh? Like an Indian, huh, huh, huh!

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Why did Dom stop smoking? Because he died

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What's worse than the holocaust? Giovanna Plowman.

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Why didn't the black man understand an anti-joke? Because like any other member of the human race, he expected a typical joke structure to occur, starting with a misleading introduction which then using surrealism or misguidance trails into a humorous punchline.

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Waffles ate my grandma

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Knock knock. Stop making puns at my door!

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A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips and falls violently.

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What do you call a deer in the wild? a deer

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"....did he fire six shots or only five....." It doesn't really matter, considering he will die of blood loss soon

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Trees are my friends because they welcome me with open limbs.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What comes after 69? 70

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Why don't you want to shout "Hi" to your friend Jack on an airplane? Because he's deaf and will not hear you.

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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What does the cookie monster and the blue man group have in common? They are both homosexually active

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what do you call a tall skiny kid with a very big ego autistic.........colby schluter.

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Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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