What do you call two blacks on a bike? Two good friends having a good time.

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Simon walks into a bar. He orders his favorite beer. The bartender says "Hey Simon, I see you're back with the usual, aye?" Simon says "Touch you tongue to your elbow." The bartender couldn't do it.

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Q: What's worse than stepping a LEGO in the middle of the night? A: A landmine

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How many dead babies will fit in a bathtub? Seventeen

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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hard cheese

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A guy walks into a bar- he walks out of the bar because the beer was expensive and he didn't feel like getting drunk.

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A slutty deer walks into a bar she then comes out and says wow i cant believe i blew 30 bucks

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what does dana do in her free time? make love with jarrett

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it did not realize it was a man-made distinction for constructed transportation vehicles and had a coincidental tendency to walk toward the area on the other side to find food or avoid birds flying over.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm an expert on flowers.

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A white man, a black man, and a mexican are stranded on an island. They all died.

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Roses are Red. Violets are blue. I took a shit on your wife's face last night.

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What happen's when you give an alcoholic whiskey? He's an alcoholic, so he drinks it.

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Q:A man walked into a bar. He looked at everyone and suddenly started crying. Why? A: Because everyone was drunk, and therefore came to the point where no one could remember him or anyone else.

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How do you kill a innocent young boy walking from school? I don't know but do you want to enjoy a refreshing beverage of creaming soda?

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for keeps?

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well thats a stupid question, just one.

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Someone stopped playing Skyrim.

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What is the difference between a black man and a bench A bench can support a family of five

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lays on it's back? A school bus after a traffic accident

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what did the policeman say to an armed robber? you can go, as long as you don't hurt my doughnuts

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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Roses are red, Violets at blue. My mind is twisted, Bend over bitch your about to get fisted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops