What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire? Lawyers exist, are alive and despite all claims to the contrary, can withstand sunlight, garlic and the sign of the cross. They also have reflections and whilst they may eat black pudding from time to time they don't depend on blood as a source of nutrition.

What happened when a black lady sat in the front on a bus? She didn't vomit because she could see the road, which helped with her motion sickness. Also the driver got in a better mood because he had company, and the lady was a pleasant person.

When u r using ur computer and then all the sudden it says reload and something about an error blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah .. ......blah blah blah. Blah blah. Your response: "AWWWWW BITCH ASS FUCK U"......*LEAVES ROOM*..... (HOUR LATER)*COMES BACK IN THE ROOM* "Oh hey, Meet my bff she is from your version of Hell her name is , Vir-is (virus) anyways Vir-is wanted to have sex with u and probably give u a USB Transmitted Disease A.K.A. virus then wwhile u r rebooting Vir-is and I is gonna kill u Toodles

What is the worst thing about a couple of white kids playing with a couple of black kids? There are no parks or recreation centers within walking distance from there houses.

why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

A gay guy asks a boy out and a girl The girl said no but the guy said yes And the two gay guys went to dinner And made out

How do you get a clown off a swing set? You throw an axe at his head when he's not looking.

A bear goes to target, soon after animal control came and put it in a nearby zoo

Why do black people like fried chicken? Well you see....

vatalk you are retarded!!!!!

Why did Bob wear a jumper and trousers even though it was a very hot day? Because he is an idiot.

Then that means that, I thought I was working with you? No wonder things did not work out, no wonder jerks like Jonas "the wizard" got inside my team, he was recommended by this "Axel Knight"

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? Whatever you like, it can't hear you.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a dog in your apple

Q. Why did the child's mother tell him to clean his room? A. Because his room was messy.

A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

Barney is a dinosaur We see on medication! And when we are high on drugs He's a hallucination!

What's funny about a car accident involving three children, a widow, and a dog? Nothing.

I like my women how I like my ice-cream Out cold.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <<

whats the difference between justin beiber and a gay guy? both guys and girls like gay guys

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would run away too if your name was urdaagaa.

A man walks into a bar. He proceeds to begin his bartending shift.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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