My Muslim friend is always late to everything. We call him 9/12.

IM SEXY AND I KNOW IT Chrysanthemums are pretty but toads and people are damn to horny

What's worse than a spray tan? - A spray tan of hydrochloric acid.

a plane crashes on the boarder of america and mexico where do you bury the survivors. you dont bury the surviors

Why doesn't Lucinda have a penis? Because she's Mexican.

Q: Why did Susan fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Q: Why did no one help her up? A: She had no friends Q: why was she at the play ground? A: Her parents were fighting again Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susan

What do you get when you fall in love? A guy with a pin to burst your bubble.

Refrigerator

Why does girls have two left feet and two left hands? Because girls have no rights.

a man walks into a bar with a monkey i forgot the rest of the joke your moms a whore

one bright morning in the middle of the night two dead boys got up to fight back to back they faced each other drew thier swords and shot each other a deff policeman heard this noise came and shot the two dead boys if you dont believe this lie is true ask the blind man he saw it too

A dog, a cat, and a a fish were having a conversation while their owners were away. Ashton Kutcher is a murderer.

Knock knock Come in

A man with ADD walks into a bar, what did he say? Look a squirrel!!!

What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

Matthew Baker

Q: What's green and goes through walls? A: A pickle, you just have to throw it really hard.

What did the Iraqi Suicide bomber bring on the airplane? His Kindle, he enjoys reading books

It is Scientifically proven that, if you have a shower in china... you get wet

what do you get when you see jonny cry-a monkey lol

What made your girlfriend laugh to death? You dropped my pants.

What's that on my back? Tell me it's your phone ! Its my phone.

Elizabeth Warren

An man walks into a bar and then proceeds to purchase an alcoholic drink.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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