A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Your Black, Im Black, We're all Black

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They didn't. She was a blind deaf-mute, there was very little she could do wrong

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Jesus can walko water Humans are 70% water I can walk on humans Therefore i am 70% Jesus

thumb_up thumb_down +28

you wanna hear a good anti joke?, so do i

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why couldn't the colorblind boy play Twister with his friends? He was a quadriplegic.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Your momma is so stupid, because she didn't get a proper education

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the dog say to the cat Nothing dogs cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the man get from killing his own wife and children? A boner.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did lil' Jimmy fall off his bike? The weight ratio between the left and right sections of his body became uneven due to some sort of change in the traction of the tires to the bumps on the road/ path.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But here's my number, So call me anytime you're free, but I can't guarantee I will answer because I could be at work.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

people on this site vote for anti-jokes that make them laughed

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Yesterday I was diagnosed with Depression... It made me sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Do you want to hear a joke?!?!?!?!?!?! A happy orphan

thumb_up thumb_down +26

whats long ,hard and full of sea men ? a sumureen

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Whats the difference between a Bicycle and a duck? They Both have handlebars, except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was standing next to you.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Knock, Knock!! Who's there?! The Police!! Open the f*cking door and get down on your knees.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did obama say to the united states of america YES WE CAN

thumb_up thumb_down +24

In Soviet Russia, Stalin kills you

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Okay, are you a tree? A: No, no I am not.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

So three hikers decide to face the deadly challenge of climbing Mount Everest. They were unaware of the risks, and were all brutally killed in an avalanche.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops