What do you call a dog with no wings? A dog

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Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

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What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

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Yo momma so fat she when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

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one day a white guy was in detroit. it was very strange. nothing happened

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How many of amanda todd's frinds does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question, she doesn't have any

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What happened when the dinosaur walked into a lake? It got wet

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What do you say to two cows? Hey cows.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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A man walks into a bar... The steal bar hurt his face and had to get stitches.

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Hey girl, are you from Jamaica? Cus ja makin me go temporarily insane.

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Why did the trombone player have sex so often? Because he was hot.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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Why do basketball players wear bibs? They don't.

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What hurts worse than a papercut? Divorce.

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what does a gay horse eat heeyyyyy

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A mermaid walks into a bar, but she has no legs, so she flops over and proceeds to drag herself into the bar.

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A dog walks into a bar. The owner got a fake service dog identification and everyone really enjoyed it.

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Why does a clown wear makeup? So you can't identify him to police after he shoves your kids in his tiny car and drives away.

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What happened to the man who lost his job? He couldn't support his family so they all became homeless and eventually died of starvation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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