OOOOPPS /

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What happens if George Washington is still alive? World population increases by 1

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! Win a few Lose a few I'm Donald Trump!

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What did the (real) wrestler say to the U.F.C guy? Probably something nice because most U.F.C fighters were wrestlers.

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can probably lift more than 80 pounds

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Why did the weird, creepy old man in the beat up van give ice cream to the little girl? Because his company went bankrupt and as part of a court order, he was thereby forced to give away the remaining contents of his inventory to those who seeked it.

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What did Batman say to Robin after they got on the bus? We should have taken the batmobile.

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what's pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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Your mom is so fat that she should watch her weight and maintain a healthy diet.

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Your mama is so fat. Just look at her.

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Why was the grandomther crying? She just got pepper sprayed.

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I began as a dreamer, then I became a visionary, then I saw my dream come true, until it shattered us all. Do you believe that perhaps, there are people out there, trying to stop the world from reaching a better age?

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Q: Whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion A: Getting raped by three giant scorpion's

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Why did it die Nothing died

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Why did the 14 year old girl have sex? Because she's in love with her boyfriend and that's how she expresses it.

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What is worse than blue balls for a guy? Depending on the girl, absolutely nothing. Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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Take sebastian deep into the woods and put him down quickly

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs sitting on your street corner? Suicidal.

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What happens if you fell off a 600 foot cliff? You die.

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how do you make a little girl cry?? Kill her family

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chicken is a funny word, and the road is a plot device.

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just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

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An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops