What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who Doctor Octagonapus! BLAAAUUUUGGGHHHH

What's a joke? Funny

a homeless man walks into a bar, the bartender and patrons treat him nicely, and sympathize for his current situation.

a man with a serious lung diesease was brought into a hospital, through continuous care they were not able to save him and he died the following morning.

What did the elephant say to the poacher? Answer: Dear God in heaven, please don't kill me for my ivory.

What do you give the person who has everything? A 20$ gift voucher

Why did I miss my bus? Because my watch was wrong.

What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One you can smash with a hammer and the other is just a watermelon.

How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

When is a door not a door? When it has yet to be created from its base components.

Train A leaves the station at 1:42 while traveling in 176kmh. How long will it take for the conductor to realize the bridge it ou... Too long.

I saw my friend stabbing a girl. i asked what is he doing "Oh im just killing time" turns out the girls name is Time Demson. What a weird name i thought to myself.

So a rouge names creampiiemaker was walking in the vast lands of the arathi basin when a night elf druid with 585 stan and a resil rating of 6750 asked yo bro you wanna duel, the rogue asked with a grin on his face if the night elf was kidding, they then shook hands and went out to gold shire, village and dined on porridge made from the finest vendor, they then warsonged it up all night for mad honor points and got lap dances in gold shire tavern.

KEVIN CRUMMY SMELLS LIKE SARAHS (I)

why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent

Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't. It's dead.

I regret everything.....

What is red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

Why is Kyle so gay. Nobody knows

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

So when I came home from work the other day, I saw tha my dog was foaming at the moth, so I took him to the vet It turns out that my dog didn't have a thing for marshmallows but had rabies instead and was promptly put down.

What do lazy asses get for Christmas? Fat

tennis grunts . . . no different from sex noises

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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