whats funnier than a joke? A: a funnier joke

What do you get when you cross a parrot and a beach ball? A beach ball with a parrot design on it.

Two muffins are put in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "is it just me or is it getting hot in here?". The other muffin says,"HOLY CRAP!!!!! A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!".

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Not having an apple, reguardless of its inhabitants.

What's the difference between a plane and a Muslim dentist? A plane hasn't dedicated its life to the study of dentistry

So, a Hispanic, Jewish, Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "Aren't you tired of this?"

Why did the man not come out of the closet? He wanted to stay in narnia.

A black man walks into a bar. His parents were immigrants from South Africa.

What's black and is as fast as a car? A black car.

what is worse than tripping over a tree root? getting mauled by a 60 foot bear

Knock knock? Who's there? Set up. Set up who? Punch line!

Wow, so today is 9/11? Yes.

A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

The king asked the jester why was he not telling jokes. He wasn't because he's a jester and therefore is obligated to be funny.

How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

scenario: two teddy bears wrestling under water question: how many apples does it take to tussel with a potato answer: 96 becouse pillows dont eat chease

What do you call a barrel full of monkeys? A game, you idiot.

Tom and Ralph are In a verbal scuffle. Tom: your adopted ralf! Ralph: yes! Now I have lesser chance of high blood pressure!

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza has cheese on it.

Chuck Norris doesn't do push-ups. He prefers to bench press.

Why won't the carny let the black kid on the carnival ride? He doesn't meet the height requirements

Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

Why do alcoholics use brown bags? Because they are ashamed of what they have become and seek to repress their guilt by entering into denial.

Whats worse than burnt toast? Getting molested

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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