What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

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What's brown and rhymes with poop? Dr. Dre.

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Doctor, Doctor, I can't feel my legs? We're going to have to amputate it to prevent infection, you won't be able to walk again.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? What do you mean what's the difference?!?! One of them is a fucking elephant!

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whats black and blue and has three legs? An abused deformed person.

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What is the same about fries chicken and watermelon? There both delicious.

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Q: What do you get when you throw a piece of bread in the oven? A: 6 million Jews

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what is orange red and blue, has wheels , and can talk? i don't know that's why i asked you

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What is Oedipus' favorite tv show! How I Met Your Mother

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Why was the turtle blue? He wasn't you are color blind.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Can you pass the soda? Sure.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No neither has he.

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A: How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q: None! They shouldn't have to...

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Q: What's worse than falling off a mountain A: Falling off a mountain into a pile of spikes

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knock knock? who's there? a guy..... so the man open's the door and the guy clutching a knife stabs repeatedly at his chest killing him and drags his body down into his cellar locking him away from the open world. by Mad James

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Christianity

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It's valentines today! My girlfriend died.

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What do you call a man who never farts in public? A private tooter!

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A beautoful poem: Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun! gimme all your money!

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Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

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Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

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Boy, do I love chicken strips. Sometimes, when I’m home alone, I’ll take some chicken strips fresh out of the oven and rub them in my scalp. It doesn’t do much for my hair health, but I like the way they feel running through my strands of hair. The flakey coating, smooth white meat, and warmth. Yum.

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what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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What did the tomato say to the ketchup? Nothing both vegetables and condiments are inanimate objects, therefore cannot speak

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops