Knock Knock. Who's there? ........ It turns out it was Helen Keller.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why didn't Debbie go to the theme park with the rest of her family? Because she died the week before.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Ed Milliband looks like an amphibian.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

An Arabic Muslim is on a plane. He's flying to Chicago.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you torture Helen Keller? You put her on a table and slowly pull her limbs off

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the framer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Excuse me, I have a shitload of stuff to do, so you are Eliza huh? I thought that was just one person conveying something to someone. Anyway, what is your name? My name is actually Nero, but you do not strike me as an Eliza, first name is more than enough. You know, if you dare, Ill be back shortly, I was gonna shower but then again, I haven't moved at all today, so yeah. Saved you? I have never saved anyone well, excuse me then, see you around, worry less about people bothering with us chatting, hell they might risk learning something (not a chance, people here are fucking jackasses, with one exception, and I do not mean me this time).

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Wait what? What if you use the what what? Sorry I am still like super hypnotic trippy, dont worry though, I dont want it to end.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

ur mamas so ugly cause when she looked up at the sky it started to rain

thumb_up thumb_down -19

knock knock whose there? banana banana who? knock knock? whose there? banana knock knock? whose there? banana

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why didn't the cow go to the candy store It had diabetes poor cow :(

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's a foot long and slippery A dick

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did John's girlfriend get him for their 5 year anniversary? Proactive because his acne bothers her.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Girl: That's pretty big. Boy: That's what she said. Woman: Yes, I enjoys large genitals.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What does a black man love more than anything? His family you racist c u n t.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Ross Tumilty is gay 8===D

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you get your mom off a clown? hit your mom with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Your mom is such a slut that your dad didn't even ask her if you were his biological child and raised you as if you were, regardless of what the dna results may suggest.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One is plastic and dangerous to children. The other holds groceries.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Trust me, you are that kind of girl, and no, you are not nerdy, you are open and down to ground, while your beautiful exterior means a lot to me (I am a man, its the way I am), I would never have wanted to talk to you or even less visit you with a pack (make it five packs) of condoms, if you where the awkward Asperger kind of gal, so how old are you, like seriously?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

You are so ugly that when u were born, your mom was unable to breast-feed you because she would have to look at your face to do so.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops