Why did the chicken get taken into the kitchen? If u dont get this you need to go b ack to school

thumb_up thumb_down +7

2 blondes walk into bolemics anonymous.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh yeah... You're mute.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you get when you cross a lamb and a pigeon? You get your house taken away.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

This is like another one: Terry is at work eating a cookie.. He drops his cookie. His co worker trys to pick it up, however he accidently stands on it. Turns out terry can keep a grudge, nine years later, he killed his co worker with a shovel.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How did the weak old man with cancer beat it? He hung himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What happened to the man who killed his family? Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A black guy and a white guy are arguing over what race god is. So they go to god and ask what race he is. They never got their answer, because god doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

An African-American man calls KFC. An employee answers. "Thank you for calling KFC." The man replies, "I'm sorry, I must have dialed the wrong number."

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the Asian say to the Mexican working at the friutstand? Hi, I'm Asian!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

If you give a mouse a cookie... you're destroying their natural diet.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: How do you make three atheists cry? A: Kill their families.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

penis

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Everything's looking fine, ma'am. Hope to see you again real soon.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

You know what me and Bill Cosby have in common? Katie..

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What would you do if your penis disintegrated? Never mate again.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the difference between victims of Brady and Hindley and a pile of dead babies? Some were born dead and the others were raped then killed.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do two Jews have in common? They both practice the same religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

guy walks into a bar, ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +7

To (down) Below: BAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! LOLOLOL! MWAHAHAHAHA HOHOHOHO HEEEEEEEEEEHEEEEEEEHEEEEEEE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAAHAHA... Man I cant breathe! YUCK YUCK YUCK! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA! AHAHA! HOHOHOHOHOHO HAHAHAHAHA!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you stay out of Heaven? you stay alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Choir.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops