What green and eats rocks? Grass, i lied about the rocks

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Say the line below sixteen times very fast: I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... Done? Good boy!

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What us black and white and read all over The newspaper

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Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

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An Italian, a Mexican, and an American are sharing a meal on the Titanic. They all died for the women and children first.

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Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

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A lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for a map. The Bartender takes him into a room and rapes him.

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How do you treat people that cannot say no in just two seconds? (redux and spellchecked) Treatment: Hi...: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! SAY IT MUAHAHAHA! People: NO PLEASE I CANT! NOOOOOO! *door unlocks* Problem solved, NEXT!

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So three black men walk into a bank, one of them uses the ATM, they all proceed to the exit after he is done.

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An American almost walks into a store when he sees a Jew. The Jew was also about to walk into the store, So the american opens the door for him and says"Jew first."

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I AM SHOWERING IN THE BLOOD AND ORGANS OF ENDORPHIN RUSH IN ORDER TO APPEASE THE GODS KNOWN AS... ME, MYSELF, AND I!

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Which came first, the chicken , the egg, the chick, the dinosaur, or the fried chicken nuggets?

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Ask me if i am a tree? "Are you a tree" No.

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A guy watches TMJBtv on YouTube. He then shoots himself.

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Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

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What do you call a bus full of white people? A Twinky!!!

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What do you do if you run over a black man? Call an ambulance... he's probably about to die.

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A: How do you piss off a female pilot? Q: Kill her family

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't give in to peer pressure.

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What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

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What did the bacon say to Sam's eggs? Why are you green?

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Q: Why did Susan fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Q: Why did no one help her up? A: She had no friends Q: why was she at the play ground? A: Her parents were fighting again Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susan

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How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 116 years.

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Why did Suzy Fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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