Sarah Palin

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how did the fat man get up the stairs he walked

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

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who is the shortest man in the world? ADITYA DEV

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Why did the fireman go to the police station? He didn't go to the police station, he went to the fire station.

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What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

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black people

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But here's my number, So call me anytime you're free, but I can't guarantee I will answer because I could be at work.

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What did the Black guy say to the Jew? Lets be equals

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What was the cancer patients last wish? For the pain to go away...Yolo...-Avery Scott Vartanian

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What did the clown say when his car broke down? Sh*t!

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because Acl tear stepped on a spit.

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"Knock knock." "No."

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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Guy A turns to Guy B and says, 'Hey, can I use your cellphone to call my mom?" Guy B nods and says, "Yeah, sure, just press redial." Guy B had been planning an surprise party for Guy A and had called Guy A's mother for ideas.

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Two straight men walk into a gay bar and promptly forget why they went to a gay bar when they are both clearly heterosexual.

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas ? A treadmill

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A blonde girl walks into a hairdressers and asks for a slight trim. She leaves the hairdressers fairly happy with the result although she was unhappy with the price which she later concluded was most likely because of the rising inflation. However overall she felt it had been a successful outing.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Why didn't Sally get back up? She had no legs Guess who's getting prosthetic legs for Christmas! Not Sally.

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What is yellow and bright? The sun.

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What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

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Why was the kid picking his nose. Because someone shoved a bomb in it.

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What's the difference between a melon and a baby? You have to cut open the melon before you can eat it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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