Your mum so ugly that she isn't married

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw...

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What is black, white, and red all over? The Wall

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Knock Knock! Whos there? Doctor! Doctor who? exactly.. how did you know?

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Why did the kids all eat their homework? Probably because they were starving to death and there was no other food source available.

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Did you hear about the guy who came onto his best friend's wife? Yeah, she handed him some kleenex after and told him to wipe it off.

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Have you ever been to Uranus? Well I heard it's nice this time of year.

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What's the difference between you and a polar bear? I don't hate the polar bear

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What's black and white and red all over? News paper that was used to cover up a dead body.

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What does a salmon and a falcon have in common They both live underwater except for the falcon.

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what did the white car look like... a black car but the color is different

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What did Shaq do when he first met Rondo? Play Basketball

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haha Otarts was here

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facebook is like a refrigerator. you eat it.

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Why didn't Joey play with the other kids on the playground? Answer: He was dead

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Why was Jerry Sanduski at K-Mart? He heard boys pants were half off!

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A mercenary was sent from the US to kill a terrorist leader. He was captured by the terrorists but wouldn't give away any information. They beat him, shocked him, cut him, and punched him in a dark room with a light beaming right down on him like a spotlight. It was a grueling five long days until they said "We know you have the information we want, tell us or you will die!" The mercenary sat in silence. They took out a gun and pointed it to his head. The mercenary then broke down and told the terrorists the information they wanted to hear. The terrorists then shot him to death.

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"Jim would you like to share what you've written?" says rehab counselor "Roses are red, Violets are blue, Heroin is bad, I see sound."

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A man is traveling to the nearest grocery store. He stops at an intersection and notices a another car beside him. It was a black corvet. So he blew it up and the men inside of it as well. He then proceeded to call the cops as to try to cover the explosion up as if it was not his fault. Unfortunately, the police had video evidence of the incident through video surveillance and the man was arrested for life. He never got a second chance in life and eventually died a slow, painful death in the hands of cancer at the age of 91.

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What did hitler say when he spilt coffee all over himself Ow I am burnt

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96 there mad at each other instead its 69

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Me: Ask my if I'm a secret agent. You: Are you a secret agent? Me: I cannot disclose that information.

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What's Blue and tastes like orange cake? A blue cake.

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What do you get when you cross a squirrel and lasagna? I don't know,I'm asking you the question.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops