Chuck Norris has a chin under his beard.

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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a guy walks into another tall man knowing that he has something weird in his mouth. he pulls out a fly, apologizes for running into him and promptly walks to his small appartment to brush his teeth. the next day a fridge hits him in the face and he spontaneously combusts. he was never seen again.

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what does chicken and triceratops have in common both their jokes are anti-climatic, from lack of punchline

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A cat ran into the road...I hit it

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How do you make a car? You build it.

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Two blondes walks into a tavern, which is kind of funny, since the second one should have seen it.

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What do you call a green land with wheels? Grass lied about the wheels.

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How did the blond become a pilot? By attending flight school, graduating, applying to an airline to which she subsequently was hired to, taking frequent training courses, and beginning work.

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Yo mommas so fat that when she walked into the ocean all the whales were far away. However, if the whales did happen to be closer to your mom it would be highly improbable that they would sing.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I gotta go to the bathroom

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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Knock, knock! Who's there?! Your Mom! Your Mom who? No really. Let me in.

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LAST COMMENT? DISGUSTIIIING! NO YOU TAKE IT!

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Q: On a scale of 1 to 10, what is your favorite color of the alphabet? A: Apple

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While i was driving, my son asked, 'Have you had an accident in the last 5 years Dad?' And I replied, 'You're almost four now son'.

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What does God say when a balck person is person is borned? "Another burnt one"

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What's better than fornicating two 4 year old twins? Killing their parents in front of them before you do.

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I wont say I got much money, but neither do I need it, just be honest to me, because if you lie, every advice I give you, could cost you or me everything, our lives, our families... Collateral damage is a term used very often and lightly ever since 9/11

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Whats worse than losing your phone? Buying a new one and then losing that

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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And the girl said: "I'll be ready in 2 hours!"

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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wanna hear a joke? i dont

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops