What do Ash Ketchum and Peter Francis Geraci have in common? Absolutely nothing.

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What is big, green, fuzzy, and would kill you if it fell on you? A pool table.

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Did you hear about the one about the man who walked into the library? He likes reading

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Want to hear what's totally out of this world? Not wasting a whole page of space for something that doesn't even vaguely resemble a joke. [L]

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Polly went out for a fag. Then she was raped.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What is red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are flowers, And daisies are too.

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wanna here a good joke? me too.

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I was raped the other day... I still did more work than the bitch

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Where's Waldo? In rehab. Waldo is in rehab.

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Why was the girl crying? She just got diagnosed with cancer you inconsiderate bastard.

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Why did the dog bark? Because he wanted to.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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If you are riding uphill in a canoe and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to fit in the dog house? None. Ice cream has no bones.

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It's 4/20. You know what that means? Today is a Wednesday

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what do you call someone with one arm? Handicapped.

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Why did the baby cry? His dad was holding him upside down over a fire.

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What do call a someone with no arms, legs, and has an eye patch? Names

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What did the 14 year old girl get on her birthday? A cake that read, "You're adopted"!

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So you into art? You been to Louvre by the way?

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What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

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How do you stop a man from jumping off a building? Push him off a building.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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