Teacher- What comes after 69 Boy- Mouthwash?? Teacher- LEAVE!

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What's the main difference between dogs and children? When children reach their teen years they grow up and leave home. When dogs reach their teen years they die of old age.

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VAL SUCKS

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Do homeless people get knock-knock jokes?

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Why did the golfer take an extra pair of pants to the golf course? In case they ripped and he needed a replacement.

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Knock knock Who's there? The events which followed are described by police as the August 4th massacre in which a family of five were brutally murdered by two prison escapees who broke into the house in search of a place to hideout.

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Why did the frog cross the street? To make babies

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How does a black man cut his hair? At a hairdresser

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three lesbians on a plane they were all responsible and had sex when they got home and not on the plane

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What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings! What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Adelle....

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Your dads so fat he needs to go on a diet

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why did the kid let go of his kite? He got struck by lightning

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what did the paraplegic man get for Christmas? a unicycle

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Why did the boy with one arm have no friends? He was a cereal killer from Ireland.

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what do you call a black man flying a plane?? a pilot ,you racist!

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What did the elephant say to the other elephant? We're both elephants!

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A frog hops into a bar. The bartender asks "What can I get you to drink?". The frog hops out and the bartender realizes he is talking to animals because he has anxiety issues and all of his friends leave him and he spends every night crying and waiting to be loved...so he shoots himself.

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whats white and big and white? alot of things...

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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Bride: "He went to Jared's!!! Ex: "But every Kiss Begins with Kay...."

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01101110 01101001 01101110 01100101 00100000 01100101 01101100 01100101 01110110 01100101 01101110 translate here http://binarytranslator.com/

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Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is your chest, As flat as my back?

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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Where do you find a good lawyer? In the cemetary

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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