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three white men are running after a black man,, the black man is winning the race

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Papa Smurf: Why did the chicken cross the road? Grouchy Smurf: I hate chickens!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Frank. Frank who? Cut the shit, I'm being chased by a tiger!

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A black man has a job.

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Hey, did u know that diarrhea is hereditary? It runs in your jeans By: Trey & Trenton of Texas

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2 men walked into a bar. the other one ducked.

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Why did the muslim cross the road? To get to the other Saiid.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The FBI. We need to check your house for dead bodies.

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Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

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what is worse than losing your phone? having it destroyed because you were texting while driving causing an accident and you are not eligible for and upgrade for another two months.

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What did the blond do on October 12th? Get hit by a bus

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What did one cat say to the other cat? Meow. What did one dog say to the other dog? Meow. Why was the man sad? He had a retarded dog.

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i hate this glue. give me one new or i will poo.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? I didn't say anything because it isn't living and it can't talk because it is impossible.

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You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

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1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

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What is blue and smells like the sea The ocean

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What do you get when you cross professor plum with a candle stick in the library? A dead prostitute. Try and be more careful next time.

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What did the boy with four arms get for Christmas? A Laptop. Why couldn't he use it? He had no fingers.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a sloth? Everything. The blonde is a human being and humans are way different than sloths.

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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Q: What do you call a real joke on anti joke A: Someone obviously don't understand the concept of this website

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What did Jesus say as he walked on water and people went like WOHOO! OMG WE ARE TOTALLY GOING TO CHISEL THIS INTO JEWTUBE SO EVERYONE CAN SEE! "BEHOLD AS I WALK UPON THIS WATER WHILE ALL OF YOU HAVE FAILED BEFORE ME! ONLY I CAN WALK OF THIS WATER OF FROZEN WITHOUT SLIPPING! Nero: Because go fuck yourself asshole. Lol... Jewtube was not as widely available as youtube so yeah... Walking on ice without falling over was a big thing back then... You know such as OMG! EATING BREAD AND DRINKING WINE! WOOOOOOAAAAH SCIENCE! AND BURNING BUSHES SPOKE AND... Moral: "Ill be back, you know, just to annoy you, and because I want to, a real man needs no other reason, and that is why you fuckers need so many of them"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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