I'm Batman.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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A black man walks into a... nevermind, this joke is dumb.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wioFUrwny1c

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What do an eagle and a gopher have in common? They can both fly, except for the gopher

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Henry was struck by a train. He was mourned by his parents.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was blind.

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My did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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If she's old enough to count, she's probably in second grade.

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Q: whats worse that sucking at piano A: the world blowing up

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How do you make a boy cry? Kill his family

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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What's worse than a holocaust? two holocausts.

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There once was a boy. On his birthday, he got a small puppy. The puppy was white and had big eyes. Boy loved his puppy and the puppy loved the boy.

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A man became infected with Staphylococcal Food Poisoning. The doctor said, "You only have 24 hours to live." He died 24 hours later.

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how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

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How did the blond become a pilot? By attending flight school, graduating, applying to an airline to which she subsequently was hired to, taking frequent training courses, and beginning work.

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How do you make a car? You build it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I gotta go to the bathroom

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Yo mommas so fat that when she walked into the ocean all the whales were far away. However, if the whales did happen to be closer to your mom it would be highly improbable that they would sing.

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Two blondes walks into a tavern, which is kind of funny, since the second one should have seen it.

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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What do you call a green land with wheels? Grass lied about the wheels.

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Knock, knock! Who's there?! Your Mom! Your Mom who? No really. Let me in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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