yo momma is so fat that she got diabetes and lost her legs

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's worse than an anti-joke about an anti-joke? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I haven't had sex for about 2 years, 10 months, 20 days and 4 minutes. It doesn't bother me though.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't, he died like everyone else.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

how come the exorcist eat crème brülé? because that deserves a carlsburg

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why couldn't Little Johnny read his 3rd grade novel? His was repeatedly stabbed in his eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A duck, a rabbi, a homosexual, and the president walk into a bar. As a result, bruises appeared on their foreheads.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q. How many babies does it take to paint a room? A. Depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the old man say to kid who was begging to his mommy? Shut up.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why couldn't the little girl see in the dark? She had no eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Waseem is a hard worker.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Fox News

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Your mama's so stupid because she has down syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Mr. Wonder, optimism is seeing the glass as half full, pessimism as seeing the glass half empty, and realism as not seeing the glass at all.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin inside a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man walks into a bar, purchases a beer, and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what do you call an elevator full of white people. a box of crackers

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Where do cows go when they're bored? Wherever they're standing. Cows cannot use toilets, regardless of their mood.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why couldn't the blonde turn on the TV? The TV was broken.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is the difference between a dead baby and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops